Coup De Tarte - 16 - Falling For Cake (Updated 4/30/24)

He started to panic

And then he checked the trash

But there was no plastic

Nothing that he could grab

So he washed his hands

And then he fixed himself a drink

And everything would be fine 

At least that's what he would think

So the night continued

And everything seemed okay

Except the Pieman knew

What just had taken place

And though not a secret

That seemed worth having

It can't just disappear 

Without further understanding 

But he saw Baker Brian

Working diligently

And nothing seemed to change

Except for one minor thing 

For when they locked eyes 

It was more than just a clue

Baker Brian's goo-goo eyes

Said all that they had to 

[...]

The next day came

Like the last

But Mestuffstoplease knew

He'd have to act fast

For if Baker Brian 

Decided to chat

What would be said

And who would all laugh

He made up his mind 

To keep Baker Brian close

To see how he acts 

And to hear what he knows

So he'll be in the kitchen

With the rest of the crew

And he'll prepare for the worst

Just in case he has to 

[Froster Felicity]

Did you end up going to the Pink Fairy

[Baker Brian]

No, I missed it 

But I heard it was so fruity

[Froster Felicity]

Yeah, it was off-the-strap-on wild

[Baker Brian]

Girl, I can't wait to go

Are you going on Masked Monday?

[Froster Felicity]

Is that at the Pink Fairy too

[Baker Brian]

You know it!

It's going to be so bananas

[Froster Felicity]

Sick, I wish I could

But I have to babysit my nana 

I'll come with you next time though

Make sure you post it on the Insta

[Baker Brian]

If I can remember girl

You know I'll be on dem cocktails 

[Froster Felicity]

Haha, do I ever!

[...]

Mestuffstoplease is fuming 

And wonders how he could have missed this

Who hired these reprobates 

And why is he now just bearing witness

[Froster Felicity]

So are you going to pregame at Janelle's

I hear drink prices are outrageous

[Baker Brian]

Actually I was just going to pregame here

And then meet them later if they can make it...

I figure it's only two blocks away

Plus I won't have to drive when I'm wasted 

[Froster Felicity]

God, I'm so jelly

I'm not sure that I can take it

[...]

Mestuffstoplease is momentarily disgusted

For he sees that as jelly misappropriation 

Nonetheless he tries to hold back his cringe

And focus on his current pastrial creation

But after thinking about it

This sounded like the perfect situation 

But he'll have to buy a mask

And queer attire for this occasion

He waits until Baker Brian's lunch break

Then he decides to go on his

He races to the Halloween store

To find the perfect slay outfit 

He would mix and match

Till he found the perfect style and fit 

That would get him in the door

And impress his target audience 

He picked an Okame mask

And a pirate shirt and slacks

And a multicolored vampire cape

With a pirate silky sash

He returns to the store

And would wait for Masked Monday *

Where he can bait Baker Brian

And keep him in his place

He'd keep Baker Brian close
For the remainder of the week *
And they never really spoke *
Unless it was about pastry treats

But Baker Brian gave this look *
Like he wanted something sweet

Mestuffstoplease knew without a doubt
He wanted the baby Bundt cake fantasy

Perhaps that why he doesn't laugh
At the Pieman or his deed
For maybe he hasn't told anyone 
Not even Froster Felicity 

Perhaps he can gain his trust
And see where this all goes
He can even set him up 

For all the Bundt cakes that he's known

Then quickly came Monday
And the end of Baker Brian's shift

It was after closing time

That's when Baker Brian changed outfits

He went to the bathroom 
And came out in torn up jeans
He had a Mardi Gras mask
And a polo and some beads

But he didn't have a cape 
And he didn't have a sash
Perhaps he's an anomaly

Or he lacks a certain class

 

He watched as Baker Brian
Went to the parking lot

He listened to some tunes
While he drank in his parking spot

Mestuffstoplease checked with Jefe and the Chef

Though nothing needed to be said 

For he had Jelly privilege 

Still he said his goodbyes before he left

He decided to follow him to the club
And keep his anonymity 

For he doesn't know how this is going to play
But he knows he should be discreet 

After following him for a couple blocks
Things started to get strange

He started seeing men in high heels
And some even in lingerie 

Though not quite overboard
He decided to ditch the cape 

But the pirate shirt and slacks

Seemed a fit for this kind of place

He thinks about the scene

He thinks about the occasion 

And how going to the Pink Fairy

Could damage his reputation 

After waiting for a while 

They finally let him in 
For he fit an ideal image *

And a man who was quite fit

He didn't want to mingle
Nor engage in conversation
So he stayed on the move 
Avoiding unwanted provocation

He finally found Baker Brian

And it seemed that he was alone
But it wasn't without trying 

He was just too drunk and gross *

In an effort to engage 
Mestuffstoplease would make his play
He went up to Baker Brian 

And bought him his favorite drink

[Mestuffstoplease]

Can I buy you a drink?

[Baker Brian]

Sure, I'm Brian

[Mestuffstoplease]

Hi Brian

I'm Andy

So have you been here before?

[Baker Brian]

Yeah, many times
It's amazing

Have you?

[Mestuffstoplease]

No, it's my first time

Is there a quieter place we can talk

[...]

Baker Brian looks him up and down

And says yeah follow me 

They go to the elevator 

And take it to the rooftop terrace

Where there's many alcoves
For conversation and other antics

Every alcove is secluded 

And each has a beautiful view

But any place that high 
Is bound to have to 

Baker Brian finds an unoccupied spot 
Then he moves to the parapet 

And tries to put out a vibe that says I'm hot

Do it before this gets embarrassing *

Mestuffstoplease takes a seat
Insistent on conversation
For he needs to better understand 

His complicated situation 

[Mestuffstoplease]

Brian, tell me about your work

[Baker Brian]

I work at a pastry shop
Where I get to make donut balls
And pastry desserts 

[Mestuffstoplease]

You don't sound too enthused

If you don't like what you do just quit

[Baker Brian]

I would if I could

But there aren't ideal alternatives

[Mestuffstoplease]

Do you want to stay in the culinary arts

Is there room for advancement

[Baker Brian]

Yeah, but I'll have to go back to school

And it's not something I'm ready to do yet

[Mestuffstoplease]

Do you like your boss

Or is he a prick

[...]

Baker Brian chokes on his drink in amusement

And tries to think of the right words 
That are perfect for the choosing  

[Baker Brian]

He's totally insane

I think he talks to himself

And I found him screwing a Bundt cake

[...]

Mestuffstoplease in enraged

But he keeps his composure

[Mestuffstoplease]

Really, did you catch him

Why is he still your boss
Given that kind of exposure

[Baker Brian]

Well, I didn't really catch him
But I saw it in his face 

And when I checked the stall

There was the plastic covering
Behind the toilet seat

[Mestuffstoplease]

Maybe he was just eating it

Many people eat their lunch 

In the bathroom stall at least once *
When they're just kids

[Baker Brian]

No way

I've never seen the man eat cake
And like I said I saw it in his face
So I quickly connected the dots 
When I found the missing puzzle piece

[Mestuffstoplease]

Did you tell anyone else

Does anyone else know

[Baker Brian]

No, I kept it to myself
He's kind of hot 
So I want to see where it could go

[...]

Mestuffstoplease gets up 

Grabs Baker Brian by his belt 
Brings him in a little closer

Then pushes him over the railing where he fell 

He didn't want to look

Because intuitively he understood

He needed to keep his composure
And looking wouldn't be so good

He immediately turns and walks *
At a controlled and steady pace *

Avoiding any interaction 

Proceeding down the steep staircase *

He exits out the front 

To avoid any suspicion

You would think he was a pro
From his manner and disposition

That's not far from the truth

For he's kind of a savant

All those years watching 

Jason Bourne
Don Draper

And James Bond 

Outside the building
There was not even a stir
For that's not the side 
Where the fall had just occurred 

On his walk back

He thought of the night's proceedings

From everything that happened
To what he was currently feeling 

He knew that very soon 
Cops would come to ask
For video footage at the pastry shop *
His DNA and about their past  *

But he also had faith
That all this could be explained
Besides he had an airtight alibi

And the support of his jelly team 

So he'd go on to pretend
That this night never happened
And he'd look to the past
When Bundt cake was still worth having