Crosswalk Musings

By Adam Privett

During my travels, I noticed that some of the curb ramps that I'm directed to assess are nearly perfect.  And it has happened more than once that I noticed that not too far away in undesignated areas are curb ramps that have dilapidated detectable warning signs or no warning sign at all.  Now, I thought that this was perhaps a sign of socioeconomic favoritism--since these curb ramps are in less affluent areas--but I just read that wealthier people are less likely to stop for pedestrians at crosswalks and more likely to take more candy from the candy bowl in the doctor's office (the latter is not situationally relevant, but the former is, and the latter serves to supplement the former's implication.  But, in their defense, they would find a tumor faster with the piece of candy [and an MRI machine...and 7+ years of post grad]; and I'm going to assume that they know this and seek a safer way to skirt crosswalk protocol by reaping the transferable benefits of sucking on a lozenge.  I should start using footnotes).  So, this seemingly corrupt budgetary redundancy is not prioritizing the wealthy, but assuring the protection of any who cross their streets.  Consider that next time you pass a gated community patrolled by guards*.  Or there's also the explanation that I'm assessing curb ramps based on a statistical measurement that I cannot comprehend without the data, such as traffic patterns, population density, frequency of pedestrians and or pedestrians with handicaps, or accidents (past or possible).  Or maybe the squeakiest wheel gets the oil, and that wheel tends to be, more often than not, on the chassis of a Mercedes S-Class.  

Consider this: rules are not really rules, but guidelines (^&).  I myself have been in scenarios where l ignored a pedestrian or two crossing the crosswalk.  "Why wait for you, if I'm faster (and I'm already in motion)?" And  "Besides, these drivers behind me would get really mad if I slowed down or even stopped.  They might even honk at me" (sorry, I've been watching too much House).  Flow and Reproachment are not the only reason to break traffic laws.  I see cops all the time time neglect to use blinkers because it's more efficient and effective at catching the bad guy😒.  But that's the problem with reality, isn't it?  It muddy's the water.  I guess we'll just half to settle for candid discussions instead of hardline positions (the system is designed for gridlock anyways lol),  but if this turns political, then I'm for the drivers.  I got to stick with my base  (I crosswalk less than I jaywalk and I jaywalk less than I drive.).  

Consider at least two things when breaking the rules:  Is it safe? (From tightrope walking to operating a band saw to jaywalking--are you smart enough at that particular time to conduct that specific activity?)  Is it Utilitarian? (does breaking the rule do a greater good, or a good to a greater number of people than by obeying the rule?) So if there are shades of gray, black and white, why even have a rule book?  Well, from what I learned while watching I Was A Teenage Felon, if someone operates in the black in one area, sometimes you have to get him in the gray in that or another area.  And who said retrospective laws were out of fashion (creative misconstruing?)?  You don't need a master's from Camebridge to figure that out, just a BS from liberty (misconstruction or cryptic equivocation), or a subscription to VICE.  This may lend credence to the Trap Nation movement, but I propose a new admonition: Consideration Nation 😎.  And this is not all bad, we must remember that Big Brother serves the public good (or is supposed to), and with the gray, Big Business must constantly reform or violate their own policies to satisfy customer demands.  Consider nagging Nancy at the front of the line getting a refund for that 10lbs of meat she already consumed (I'm speaking from personal experience, I believe the customer's real name was hateful Hamad...jk, geesh)... 

(Though exploratory in truth,  This is a creative endeavor.  I have omitted facts that would detract from the artistry of this entry.  In fact, I have assessed curb ramps in neighborhoods of all economic tiers within the Clearwater area.  And I have found some perfect ones in unexpected places.  But my observation is candid nonetheless, and the pertinence of Robert Sapolsky's passage in Behave cemented the persuasion of its construction.  And this is a blog, and it's not as amazing as it should be.)  

*c.f. Behave pg. 534 

P.S. I don't really think I'm a genius.  I could never be Matt Damon :(

*$* - Let us rid ourselves of the illusion of privacy for it hampers intellectual thought.  The idea that a person ought to cloud his or her mind to avoid what Karen thinks should not be a consideration we should burden ourselves with.  Embrace technology and freedom and know that you are never alone.  #LetThereBeLight

 ^& - Rules Are Not Rules: Universal Applicability 


 

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